Myth: All Healing Is The Same

This is bullshit.

A lot of healers and certain healing communities want you to believe this woo-woo concept that everyone’s tapped into the same source and therefore have equal amounts of healing abilities.

That’s a great concept for some who live in socialist healing la-la land. But in reality, everyone is born with different skillsets, differing amounts of access and commitment to those skillsets and vastly different potentials in all realms. Healing is no different from many other professions. Think about it- some people are born to be business people. We all have the ability to be a business person, but it’s the difference between how some people succeed and some fail. It’s the confluence of their natural abilities, opportunities, and then all the many chances day to day for them to exercise their skillset. It’s the difference between average and a legend. That’s why so few people become legends, because they’re not average.

You can dress the part, look the part, speak the “language” and fool many people into thinking you’re walking divinity but honestly, the person who IS vs. pretending to be will operate from a very different angle. They don’t need to pretend, overcompensate, because they ARE. They KNOW that they are. They’ve always been different and most likely their lives have been hard because of that- because it was training them to be different on a larger scale.

I’ve had many experiences with healers myself. I’ve had some who don’t understand trauma at all. They’ve never been through it., Maybe they’ve studied enough, but textbook objectivity will never give them the access, the understanding, the compassion, not to mention the EMPATHY and experience to help someone else through it. If you haven’t been there, you can’t pretend to know. Your heart can’t be half as in it as someone who has. The will to help others needs to come from a very deep place.

Secondly, there are some people who are born to do this. It comes from many past lives of honing this skill- and in this life time it comes back to you. Before I got attunements and consciously worked on managing my energy, I was zapping people with my hands because the “faucet” by which my healing energy flowed was way too strong. I’m aware that I don’t need any certifications, but I get them anyway so I can doubly strengthen my awareness of what I’m here to do and how to do it. Just because someone has a certification, however, doesn’t mean that they’re totally qualified, nor have the natural capacity and the creativity to execute it properly- be aware of this.

Thirdly- you need someone who deals with their own shit and commits to this in all areas. This is a lot harder than you think it is. It means consciously being aware of your energy at all times, maintaining not just your own body but your life. I literally put healing at the forefront of everything- it’s all I think about, it’s all I do, it’s where all of my energy goes in my own life and for others.

People will sometimes say, oh I got reiki before— but no honey, what I do is vastly different. We can accomplish what you would’ve barely touched in 10 sessions with someone else who calls themselves a healer and is just trying to make you feel good. My goal is not for you to feel good temporarily, but to create lasting change and healing. You’re going to remember me forever because when you meet me, work with me, you’ll understand what the real deal is.

Real healers can identify real healers. The phony feel threatened in a real healer’s presence.

Be conscious of what your goals are and who you work with. If you’re ready to meet me, you’ll know and I will too.

Vibrational Shifts

How do you know when you’re about to upgrade in vibrational frequencies?

What this means is there’s a heavy clearing in your energy field, patterns are being shifted out and therefore, everything in your life that doesn’t match your new energy will shift out as well.

You know because you’ll intuitively start clearing things in your home. You’ll suddenly feel like throwing things away or moving things around. You’ll also get a desire to purge energetically in other ways i.e. you’ll either start looking for healers, or upping your work out routine, or clear your body w/ saunas, treatments, colonics. You start to eat lighter. Things also start to feel unsettled and there’s a sense of “grasping”, it’s as if there’s a part of you trying to hold on to something for dear life.

These bouts happen to me infrequently, but when they hit, everything seems to go haywire. That means appointments I’ve had on the calendar randomly cancel, friends start dropping off, clients suddenly do too, and as scary and chaotic as it seems, there’s a part of you that’s assured, too.

You match with people and situations at certain frequencies and when you shift up and clear whatever match you have, they no longer can stay within your vibrational reality. That’s why suddenly, there’s a clearing in all areas of your life. YOU may even start to distance yourself randomly from people who it felt the days before, felt so close to. Suddenly there’s a repulsion where there was an attraction.

When this happens, stay calm because the new space will be filled with people and situations that match your new vibration and will introduce a new, better reality. It’s a human thing to hold on to things, but know that sometimes letting go is what frees you into a higher vibration.


For some of my clients working on relationships, I always ask, "how do you define love?" 

Usually, people have a mapped out, higher-consciousness philosophy of what love is. Ask me, and I'll reply the same.

I'd probably say something along the lines of: "I see it split into a few levels- biologically it's when hormones are flooding the body similar to an addiction, physiologically- it feels incredible to be around someone and everyone else disappears, they become what feels like "yours", spiritually, it's a union of souls that mirror one another and are along a joint path. Overall it's a strong sense of connectedness,"

I've read so many philosophical and scientific books on love, even took a course on love in college. I understand, or at least, I think I do.

So then, as someone, and as people collectively who have such a strong grasp on what "love" is, ought to be, why is it that it's the source of so many of our problems and headaches?

The reason I ask my clients what Love means isn't because I'm looking for the answer above. It's because I'm trying to help them see the truth of love's association in their minds. There's usually a dissonance here between what love means, and what love "is" or "was".

Consciously there's a reckoning of what love is in an ideal sense, but subconsciously, love maps are encoded in a way that is out of our control, that is created by our caregivers, our family and our relationship patterns. When we grow up in a family that is less than ideal, who mistreated us, it's no wonder many of us become consciously afraid of love, even though we consciously don't understand why. Many of us seek to create familial patterns in our love relationships for better or worse. We're all looking for "home" afterall. 

Take for example: my first love. He was someone who fought with me endlessly. It became about his needs and emotional volatility, and he literally would lock me in his apartment because he didn't want me to ever leave. He wouldn't let me hang out with my friends and when I was out at night (it was my first year in college no-less, I wanted to make friends and be out) he'd harass me and whine until I would give in and he'd come pick me up from where ever I was. I fell in love with him, hard, and love became associated with a feeling of entrapment. Of abuse. Of claustrophobia. Of anger, resentment, a robbing of personal agency, draining and fighting. No wonder I was terrified of it from that point on.

I remember even talking to one of my best friends at the time about it and he said, "the way --- treats you is like you're an abused child,"

It didn't click until years later as our subconscious has a way of hiding patterns from us because sometimes we're not ready to acknowledge it, he treated me the exact way my parents used to. Consciously I knew he was toxic for me, I wanted to get out of the relationship, but my conditioning, my subconscious was used to this: his insecurity, his lack of emotional responsibility, his lack of maturity, his acting out, were things I was well-equipped, and used to, handling. It felt familiar, therefore, it felt safe. FELT is necessary here, because it wasn't actually safe.

I used to wonder why when someone outright harassed me, I'd feel overly sympathetic towards them and love them more. I was used to overjustifying and being overly compassionate with my caretakers, explaining away their actions and overlooking how I felt. I was supposed to be grateful, to be a good daughter, and so being those things means disowning what I felt deep inside- hurt, abandoned, rejected, angry, frustrated, resentful

It's painful to reckon with, and scary that on the "lower" level, our past is still following us, but also recognize that there are positives to this unconscious love mapping. I am attracted to strong individuals, self-made individuals, individuals who have endured many hardships to get to where they are. I am attracted to people who are ambitious, focused and brilliant- as both of my parents were.

On the flip side, I also have incredible chemistry with men who are emotionally unavailable, people who have issues communicating, who are factual to the point of emotional vacuity, angry and narcissistic. I recognize that and as I work hard on changing it, what happens is each cycle in which my life is filled with certain people who activate those triggers, they actually become more available especially as we identify and say no to it-- our cycles repeat, yes, but it's up to us how much we try to clear that energy and imprint and progress is made when we recognize that there's movement until one LAST clearing and then it's out. Sometimes, and especially with familial patterns, usually we're resisting change because there's a part of us that's still holding on. We're holding on to our parents, of what they were to us, and what they could have been. Consciously I'm understanding that the LOVE that's innately wired in me isn't the love that's healthy for me, and that LOVE doesn't mean what I think it means, what I feel it means, or is something I really know at all despite endless intellectual parsing.

This is odd to say as someone who, as you may have read, radiates an unconditional love. It's usually one of the first things people notice about me, write about me- my love. I know what love means spiritually, I know what unconditional love is and how to give it, but on this human level it's a very different story for all of us.